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No Exit - LongestSoloEver

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Well, hello there!

It seems we have a new cast member!

What's that? Where are you? What is this place? WHO ARE YOU?

I can legally answer some of those questions!

It's your lucky day, friend!

You get to be a part of the most mind-blowing, jaw-dropping...

What... What are you trying to...

The headset? Oh

So here's the thing...

So the good news first

How'd you like to be a star?

Now forever in a show being watched from afar?

A hundred eyes in the sky, now your life on a stage is a

Mind-bending circus

A show for all ages (Ha ha!)

Buckle up, let me give you a tour

Take a ride with the pearly-white entrepreneur

You may need to calm down and adjust expectations

Experiencing digital hallucinations (My, my!)

Welcome to a world full of wonders

Where anything can happen, just imagine if you hadn't had to happen on the virtual reality that trapped you in the...

Wait, what'd I say? (Ha ha!)

No spoilers!

Oh, you gotta have a name!

Come and spin the roulette

'Til we find an arrangement of consonant letters

Are vowels negotiable?

I'll do my best

Now go meet your co-stars!

Your friends for the rest of your life

An electronical performer

You're one of us now

You're better off if you can just accept it

Within the headset, you're reborn now

We'll never know how

The only truth is that there is no exit

Say goodbye to the real world

My little superstar!

You're the brand new act at the carnival

Just stay right where you are!

There's no hope of extraction

Now you're the main attraction

Get the show underway

Singing day after day after day

The name's Caine, and I'm able to tell

That you're gonna have the time of your life in this realm

I'm the ringmaster! Showman! The great puppeteer!

Who better to entrust with your circus career?

So don't waste any time!

Let's have an adventure

(C&A is not liable in the event that you're injured, disfigured or otherwise wounded, not limited to but including)

The loss of a limb? Or an organ? Or head?

Really, head? (It says "head.")

That's hilarious! Anyway...

Now your sanity is hanging on a trivial experience

Activity designed to keep your fragile mind intact

The monotony is liminally minimal

Additionally try to keep it literal, don't get too abstract

Got it? Good

Say goodbye to the real world

My little superstar!

You're the brand new act at the carnival

Just stay right where you are! (Stay right here, there's)

There's no hope of extraction (No hope, no leavin')

Now you're the main attraction (You're the main, so quit believin')

Get the show underway

Singing day after day after day

You're looking for a way out of here

You're talking to the great engineer

There's nothing there in the void so avoid it, my dear

This door has never been opened

Surrender, give up hope

Get the show underway

Get that smile on display, and obey!

Your soul imprisoned here forever

Our leader's design

You're better off if you can just forget it

An unachievable endeavor

To leave it behind

When will you understand that there's no exit?

Is it starting to sink in, my little possession?

You need to let go of this pointless obsession with exits

You know what comes next

It's what happened to your predecessor

It's dark in the cellar (Well, well!)

Step into your new arrangement

Your estrangement

From the way you thought your life was going so be patient

No complaints, you're the entertainment!

Smile on your face or you'll end up in the basement

The maddened abandon beyond understanding the palm of my hand

You'll forever be standing and dancing in, I'm not just gonna

Give up my plan and comply with demand

There's supply to command and a cast to expand

Now I'm building my brand!

You're a celebrity! (Diva!) A mega star!

Do you know how many dream of being right where you are?

So take your adventure, and when it's complete

Have a digital feast (you can never eat)

So welcome to the circus

The spectacle bizarre

You can try to run through a thousand doors

Wait! I didn't finish this part!

Say goodbye to the real world

My little superstar!

You're the brand new act at the carnival

Just stay right where you are! (Stay right here, there's)

There's no hope of extraction (No hope, no leavin')

Now you're the main attraction (You're the main, so quit believin')

Get the show underway

Singing day after day after day

Thank you for joining us!

We'll be here day after day, after day, after day, after day

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